We'll start with some sentences for the ladies. I see her in my dreams and love it, but perhaps a fantasy relationship is not the best indication for my reality. Lest I exist in nostalgia, the tragedy has been writ, she is the oldest story in my book. I miss something we once had, what was never complete, it passed and I continue to reach for an idle hand--your phantom limb. I see fit to steer clear until the tides change.
Time spent waiting is free time wasted. Oh precious time how you're always getting wasted.
This evening (May 30th) I watched the first 20 minutes of the movie "The Blind Side" per a customer's recommendation, then I remembered I'm not in the market for that kind of heartfelt tale right now. I will watch it soon though. Instead I watched "The Wackness" it had some golden moments but otherwise it was only alright yo, great sound track though.
Otherwise I've been listening to Trash Talk's newest release "Eyes & Nines" pretty awesome. It's aggressive and simple. They're a nicely tailored suit for my peace of mind. Malcontent songs about something vaguely poignant. I can't wait for them to come back to this city. For the former half of this month I just listened to Say Anything's song "Into the Night" and the Cancer Bats cover of "Sabotage" on repeat.
I was thinking about loud sex this past month because a friend of mine made an offhand comment about it, then coincidentally enough I overheard some this month. I was just wondering if it was awkward for people to have loud sex when they'd know very well that others would be able to overhear them. Exhibitionists aside, I think so to a certain degree. After enough thought I just resolved that it's probably like masturbating, urinating in a sink to save water or any other normal bodily function. It's awkward to be heard doing one's animalistic deeds but it's not altogether uncomfortable. After all, shame is learned. I guess I'd also have to put aside those guys that grunt in the stalls of public restrooms before they make a splash. For myself, I think I'm comfortable enough with it so long as there's a closed door separating myself and whoever I'd be with (purely hypothetical, I know) between the prospective audience. On a related note, it's not at all weird to shave your face in front of people, but it is entirely deviant behavior to shave your balls in front of people, what's the deal with that?
I finally got some recognition for my efforts at being funny and likable. A sergeant from the Denver Police Department contacted me directly. Apparently RTD's transit watch had been receiving texts from my phone. Someone was reporting false suspicious behavior. The sergeant seemed dismayed to even be speaking to me, much less reading back part of a text to me. I told him it was probably one of my friends. By the way, I really need to work on my improvisation skills, I've been slacking on that shit since November of 2008. I'm immature, but it's toward an end I swear; this town's missing something.
Besides that, it was much more enjoyable than writing RTD a complaint letter. Counter productive? Perhaps. The conversation ended with me giving the sergeant my word that the texts would cease and a "Yes sir." The worst part about all of this is now when I really get tangled up with the gays and minorities in public transportation no one will believe me, I'll be just like the girl who cried rape.
Buyer's remorse. I am far too open to the power of suggestion. I've recently picked up the habit of rolling my own cigarettes. I am not good at it yet, but it's easy enough. Anyway, when I get into silly consumer hobbies like this, I like to buy nice things to start with. I planned on buying a nice little case to accommodate my cigarettes. There was a cool spring opening thin case, but because the guy at the counter suggested a different ornate case, that was wider and not spring loaded, I thought it didn't matter. But after thinking about it, I definitely should've bought the other one. It doesn't matter, I just bought something I didn't prefer. Second case of buyer's remorse; Skullcandy® headphones. I bought a pair of low-end ear buds for $25 dollars roughly a month before one of the buds stopped working. There's probably a warranty I could cash in on had I not tossed the receipt and packaging. The last pair of decent ear buds I bought did the same thing, probably just product of wearing them all the time and not taking good enough care. But I certainly don't overly abuse them. It's just shitty products. Why even put out worthless products? I know it's low-end but I didn't think it'd stop functioning within a month. Point being, I get mildly frustrated at the way I waste my income, and to a lesser extent shitty consumer goods.
Well shit, now I'm left to talk about myself and my month. I've had a resonating frustration since one night of unbearable heat and moaning but maybe the scales were tipping prior to that. Fortunately for me I've armed myself with some reference material; a new personal journal. I had stopped writing personal journals back in December and am now back at it in a different way. I'm handwriting, which is something I didn't do much before. When I hand write--I'm shorter--more impatient to get ideas onto a page. I'm slower and don't think things through, at most I can scratch out words, I can't just backspace my work. I'm liking this because rather than explain myself to myself more thoroughly all I have to do is jot down whatever the fuck I feel like writing.
Glad I took up so much space hypothesizing about what loud sex is like so I could avoid talking about my month. As always thanks for skimming my devil worship blog, see you in hell.
LUCIFY CRUCIFER
again, captcha was arstst
ReplyDeleteshit. wish i didn't toss em. somebody else told me i could do that after the fact as well.
ReplyDelete